"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
We talked him into tasing himself.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
