"it" just moved
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
