yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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