my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
