no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
