whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize