stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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