Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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