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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  You were right. It hurts to walk today.

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• (646): View more from New York

  he just put it in my mouth and said "go"

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.

  (1-912): View more from Georgia

  Who leaves their car unlocked at night?

  (912): View more from Georgia

  Someone who wants to read the newspaper.

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• (323): View more from California

  I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (818): View more from California

  She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.

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• (310): View more from California

  Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?

  (1-647): View more from Ontario

  You are fucking her boyfriend.

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