Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize