i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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