ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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