That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
