they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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