Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
