Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
