# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.