I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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