just come out here and I will go home with you...
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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