Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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