just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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