I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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