yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
