normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
