So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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