I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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