my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
