i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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