im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
