i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
