its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
