Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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