dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
