You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
All I want is dick and wine.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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