I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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