well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
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Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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