Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize