Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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