So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize