I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I think your dad took our porno
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Randomize
