he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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