I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
