I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
