why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
