just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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