drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize