I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You are a genius and a whore.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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