Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize