I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
