Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
it was like eating out sand paper
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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